TiK toK.

27/01/2010
23:16

I can't believe I fall asleep yesterday night. I'm gonna write about yesterday as well.

Yesterday (26/01/2010 Day 25)

Kayak yesterday with Anis, my buddy. Delta went first and Charlie second. Fair and square since Alpha went for "water confident" first. We were like the best buddy, we controlled everything well and no quarreling, no different min set. we were easy going on one another, no specific captain for use. Whoever wanna take charge, just take it. One taking charge, the other just follow obediently. We teased and had fun.

"Anis, now you know turning a kayak direction is not easy, I almost broke my left arm, plus turning direction are all left hand side".

Juggling show was bad. I couldn't master juggling well and I behaved cruelly with Anis. LOL.

"My buddy, Anis hanya sampai rentak , "Tas Tas Lambung" SAHAJA!!"

I don't know why I said that.

Don't worry, Anis, I promised I will burn Westlife, Backstreet Boys and Nsyns songs for you means I will. I'll bring those lyrics as well and my Ipod. I regret not blogging yesterday, I forgot my feelings and emotions.

Today (27/01/2010 Day 26)

In CB class I still refuse to do open sharing. I'm not a person that like sharing my problems with other people especially those I don't know well and those I dunno at all. I feel like my shares are not to be said in front of audiences. I, myself already have problems with my company, Charlie, my dorm mater and the rest of the Chinese girls. I know, I understand, I'm a Chinese and I refuse to speak Mandarin, not praying in Buddhist temple, not respecting and acknowledging myself as a Chinese. What do you want me to do!! This is the real me, yeah, I can use image, I can pretend to respect Chinese but how long can I survived?!?! On the first few days, I was mixing with Sam and a few Bravo-ians, we spoke Mandarin and what I ended up with? I couldn't follow, I couldn't join. Mandarin is hard for me, I'm Cantonese not Mandarin!! Why am I mixing with the boys a lot?? They speak Cantonese with me but Mandarin with other girls. I prefer Cantonese more than anything, second language, English. How CY and Wafiy and I became close, we communicate in English, we have a same mind-language here just like you all, speaks Mandarin often. Third language? Mandarin perhaps?? No, Mandarin is never my language, Japanese IS!! When I don't like a thing means I don't like, no one are able to change my mind but me

Manoj, I'll always remember you and your dream girl!! LOL

Syafiqah talked with me just now. Was asking why am I not mixing with my dorm mates, not even the Chinese, always with Dorm 6 people, not communicating with my dorm mates, not joining in during "pentadbiran dorm", always with guys, Alpha and Bravo majority, Charlie none!! Chinese girls and boys, I explained very well just now. Always mix with Dorm 6, Anis is my buddy, the rest are from CB class. We are always together.

The rest of the dorm, as usual, my attitudes, What to do, I'm the only one here dares to go out late night while the rest scare of it. Yeah, one brave girl I am but why must I show it?? During primary, secondary and even now, I create such problems. I can proudly say that my mind thinking are more to logic and boys'. Little girls have such thinking, it's a rare case. So far I know Iqa and Anis. Anis lesser, Iqa more. Why can't the girls? Example, the lake water is super dirty, so what?!?! just dive in, it's not like you;re going to die or something, you are not even washing those clothes. I know girls like tidiness and cleanliness, but please think W-I-S-E-L-Y.

I told Sarasa about my problems. What she said was right, I need to take in advice and change bit by bit.

*I fall asleep after decided to rest my eyes for awhile*

Sleepy-head,

Aki

*Unknown time*